It’s OK to say NO!
A while back a lady told me she was expected to buy thirty Christmas presents for various relatives because that is what they did. I told her to get them together and tell them that the kids, grand-kids, etc., were just getting to be too many to continue and she was not going to buy except for her immediate family anymore. Did they get upset? No, in fact, they were relieved that someone had enough courage to halt such nonsense.
Excuses, Excuses, EXCUSES!
Do you find yourself trying to come up with flimsy excuses every time someone asks you to do something you do not want to do because you do not have the stamina to simply say “No thank you, I just don’t choose to do that?” An excuse is the skin of a reason stuffed with a lie. Are you constantly walking on thin ice because you are afraid you will offend someone?
Coffee Sir, no thanks
When I was six years old, I took one sip of coffee and have never tried it again.
I have no reserve telling any hostess I do not drink coffee or tea. Out of hundreds of occasions I know of none who got offended. On one occasion I was asked how I liked my eggs cooked. Well scrambled! So she gets the pan hot, broke the eggs in the pan and began to scramble them. “I’m sorry, but I like mine well scrambled BEFORE the hit the pan. I can’t stand cooked egg whites.” She did not get upset, she cooked more.
“I didn’t have time”
How often have you told that lie. I used to walk into a class after giving an exam the period before and been asked, “Did you grade our exams yet?” “No”. “Why not”. “Because I CHOSE TO DO SOMETHING ELSE”. End of discussion, no lie needed.You have time to do what you choose to do, so just tell it like it is, and you won’t need a sleeping pill tonight.
Not good deal but you feel sorry for seller
Time to practice. “I would love to help you but your house does not fit my criteria for investing.” It was quite an awakening when I figured out that I just can’t help everyone who has a challenge with their property or life. In fact, I have discovered that not everyone wants my help anyway. Amazingly, the world got along well before I got here, and will long after I am gone.
A sigh of relief
Yep, it’s OK to quit trying to meet everyone’s expectations, tell the truth, say NO when it fits, and enjoy the peace and joy of expressing the REAL YOU!
It’s time to depart the “GUTLESS WONDER CLUB”.
Being a “pleaser” has been such a drag on my life. Also the wife has the extended-family issue mentioned her.
I am going to pass this along. Thanks!